honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
