Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
