I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
