belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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