btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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