Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
