Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
