Cold hands, warm shart.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
This is the high leading the old right now
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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