we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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