feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
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whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
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You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
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