so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Randomize
