Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
