belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
My bed smells like the plague
Randomize
