SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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