they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize