I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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