"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
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