State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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