And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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