Can Purell be used as lube?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
