Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize
