is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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