Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
