May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Just pee around me
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
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