she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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