I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Can Purell be used as lube?
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
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