you lied. pity sex is amazing.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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