That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
