I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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