Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
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