Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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