god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
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