Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Randomize
