Having a random hookup so left but love u
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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