So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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