I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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