your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Randomize
