There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
