I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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