Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
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