Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Randomize
