He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
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Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
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Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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