I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
