I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
No stitches, just platelets and will power
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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