Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a shit load of segways right now
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Randomize