I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
