So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize