no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
