Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Boobs speak an international language.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize