I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Randomize
